Please forgive me because I am about to be blatantly self-absorbed and self-indulgent. Recently I have been very nostalgic and recollective (is that a word?) of my past. I am beginning to be more and more aware of how little many people who now care about me, and even call me family, really know about the world which shaped me. Even my own children are in a sense strangers to my past. That part of my life, by virtue of it's distance in space rather than time, and because it's culturally foreign, is for the most part largely unfamiliar to those in my present, and extremely different from their own experiences. Hence, most people I've known after 1985 do not have a point of reference for understanding me or judging me fairly, even if they think they do. 
This is a self-portrait I submitted for an assignment in my college Photography class. I was 18 years old and was such a wanna-be--haha! I wanted to say pictorially that I was a mystery:-). So cheesy. But believe it or not, my Photography professor selected it as one of the few student submissions he used for a Photography Show and Exhibit.
This is a self-portrait I submitted for an assignment in my college Photography class. I was 18 years old and was such a wanna-be--haha! I wanted to say pictorially that I was a mystery:-). So cheesy. But believe it or not, my Photography professor selected it as one of the few student submissions he used for a Photography Show and Exhibit.
Recently, my boss light-heartedly told a roomful of people during a work meeting how amazed he is to discover that after years of perceiving me as "very proper and conservative" I turned out to actually be "a complex person with surprising layers to my personality." I almost felt like an onion after he said this--haha! He said this because he saw the playlist on my iPod and was very surprised that it didn't match the Marivic he thought he knew! But to be fair, his perception and judgment of me was based only on what I have chosen to share---my best foot forward, of course! I'm just really rather selective with what I choose to share about my past or present even to those in my extended family. Besides one just doesn't start telling people about their personal history for no apparent reason.
Well, it just so happens that this September coming up offers me a reason/excuse to do it. A milestone birthday is happening and it's either going to be really special or traumatic. Oi! So I was thinking in case it's the latter to do some preemptive self-therapy, which requires talking about myself :-). I will try to peel off some layers and talk about things in my early life that shaped who I am today. It's probably a good time to do this anyway before Father Time afflicts me with memory loss, before the snapshots of my past stored in my mind turns yellow and fuzzy. I hear it happens when you age--haha. So I would like to electronically preserve these memories for my children and their children in case somehow someday they'll wonder about it, and I would NOT be around anymore to talk about it. It would also be an honest reflection on my life, perhaps my way of identifying the big reasons why I AM THANKFUL FOR THE RIDE. I don't know if it's worth reading about on your part, but the series is for me, and a public journal for my posterity. So if it ends up boring some of you or all of you, I'll just have to be okay with that. But I hope it won't so you can enjoy and be thankful for the ride with me.
So please forgive me for a very self-absorbed month. If you are interested, however, stay posted, and come September hop on board and ride along! :-)
1 thankful passengers had this to say:
I look forward to the reading!
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